Monday, April 10, 2023

Morning has broken

 I am on my third day with a headache. A situation has been on my mind, one that I cannot fix, but it is something that I wish that I could. Tim and I discuss it. He agrees. But that agreement doesn't solve anything. I pride myself on being practical and sensible. I know for a fact that the only behavior I can change is my own. Despite all that rational thought on the situation, I have a three day headache, and I sleep poorly at night and have dreams. Oh, my goodness. The dreams that I have. 

For instance, a storm went through and a tree was looking questionable. So, in my dream, Tim decided to take it down. My dream life mirrors real life: I tried to talk him out of it. Just like real life, he pretty much ignored me, telling me that he knew exactly how it was going to fall. So. He started up the chainsaw and went to work, and the tree fell, hitting another tree which also fell, hitting a final tree which fell on a neighbor's truck which blew up. 

That jolted me awake.

Last night was another night of very restless, fragmented dreams which I will not bother to recount, because these ones were not amusing. Just strange. 

So I am tired this morning and I still have a headache. I took some excedrin and set my coffee to brewing, walked away and came back to discover that I hadn't put the coffee pot underneath. 

Coffee, coffee everywhere, nor any drop to drink. 

41 comments:

  1. My dream last night was being on a river, going very fast (on a raft or something?) but I was only aware of the vast river I was about to join - could see it to my right, a mile or more wide (no far sure) huge waves like surfing waves boiling towards me and I knew I was going to drown for sure. Then my river suddenly looped round a headland and I ended up in a cafe with a friend from school days I've scarcely given a thought to in years!

    Hope your tension headache eases soon. A good walk may help you think things through and unwind?

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    1. How funny. I would be trying to puzzle out a meaning to that one. As far as the headache, I simply have to accept things. It is not a situation I can change. I guess that the thing that drags me down is that it is ongoing. No matter what I do, I will be criticized for it.

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  2. Sensible advice from Jennie to walk Debby. Headaches are evil in the way they bring you down and fresh air (oxygen) does clear the system a bit.

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  3. The coffee is an example of distracted mind. Dreams are weird. Thankfully I don't remember many but at times something triggers a memory.
    Yeah, of course I offer advice. We are all armchair experts. Think about the worst case situation and pull it back in stages from there. This will require total logic and you will be back in a better headspace about this issue. There are things you can control, things you can't and things in between.

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    1. Oh, this is a situation that has been simmering away on a back burner for 26 years now. I cannot do a thing about it. It's just that a mean spirited person who wanted to inflict hurt listed a bunch of examples of what this individual does and says behind my back.

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  4. I hope that you can eventually resolve your worries and rid yourself of the headache, physically and metaphorically.

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    1. Oh, it will eventually be slid to the back burner again.

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  5. Anxiety can be so debilitating - and don't I know it! It's seldom enitrely rational and yet it's seldom the opposite either...As your blog title say's ... life's funny like that...

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    1. I suppose it is more hurt feelings than anything. And we all get over those, eventually.

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  6. It sounds to me as though a few days of complete rest might help.

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    1. I had a nice holiday weekend. Things will settle down. We just need to rethink how we handle the situation going forward.

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  7. I used to have dreams like that back when I worked. I thought once that I quit working, those sorts of dreams would stop. They haven't. They have just turned into more mundane things around the home much like your tree falling dream.

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    1. Well, I work up with a fierce sore throat. I may be coming down with something.

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    2. Not to scare you but the big C went through our house the last couple weeks, my third time around with it. My only symptom this time was a sore throat for about three days. The others had more like typical cold symptoms. With a spouse on the medical front lines and two kids in two different school districts, I'm just a melting pot for viruses.

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    3. Ugh. My son has had it 3 times, I think. We haven't had it at all here. (I do test when I am sick with respiratory stuff). We've been waiting for that hammer to fall. His daughter and her family have had it. Our daughter and her family has had it. My son's family had it again, this time simultaneously with RSV. It has never struck us.

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  8. It's so odd to me, that even as we grow older and wiser, and know from so much lived experience that intractable situations will somehow resolve one way or another, and we will find a way one way or another to live with those results--that that knowledge doesn't help us much and we still get headaches and worried dreams over them. Wishing you relief.

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    1. It is a situation that I've made my uneasy peace with. Unfortunately, an angry person who wanted to inflict hurt, and stir the pot, spewed a lot of details that I really had no desire or interest in hearing.

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  9. Hope your headache (and your worry) go away soon!

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    1. It is simply a situation that cannot be fixed. We all have situations like that in life.

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  10. So sorry to hear about the headaches - sounds really nasty and hope it clears soon by solving the problem.
    And Aaaaaaagh for the coffee mishap - that's the worst sort of mess to clear up

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    1. Mostly because it is EVERYWHERE!!!! Honestly.

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  11. Is it a head ache or migraine?

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  12. I thought the falling tree was real at first.
    BTW, we have all done that coffee thing. I did it on three consecutive days when we bought the new machine. I have done it since, but Sue has.

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    1. This morning, I got everything all set and wandered off to do something else, and came back only to discover that I had not added water in the pot. That's far less messy to set right.

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  14. It's one thing to realize you can't change a situation, and quite another to accept it. As you point out, rational thought isn't always enough. I hope things get better over time and meanwhile, I hope your sleep improves. (Maybe the coffee pot was trying to tell you NOT to drink coffee? LOL)

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    1. Without my morning cup, morning would last all day!~

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  15. First thing this morning I managed to dump my entire fresh cup of coffee over me and the floor.
    Are headaches normal for you? Is this due to stress, do you think?

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    1. Well, this morning, I have a sore throat, so maybe I'm coming down with something. How's your stomach?

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  16. When I have that sort of problem that I can't do anything about, it's usually a family thing.

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    1. Yes. Which is why we would like to fix it.

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  17. Eventually our minds let go of the worries/problems because we have to let go. I know in my case, the concerns are always there but more buried and come out at certain times. My boyfriend did the same thing with his coffee; it was ALL over the place and he was very frustrated. It's a mess to clean up. In my case, I sometimes forget to add water to the reservoir and then believe that my nearly 30 year old Krups is finally dead.

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  18. I had a Krups for years. I bought it second hand. I gave it away, and as far as I know, it is working still.

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  19. Dad calls having a cup of coffee first thing in the morning a "heart-starter" - he starts with tea, himself.
    I do hope that there is a third way to ease the issues that you have - perhaps there is no "solution" but at least something that gives you a firm enough boundary to stop the neighbour's trucks from exploding in your dreams.
    Jeanie

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  20. Unsolvable problems are so painful… I have a few, and I’ve learned I have to distance myself from the whole situation… but unfortunately it still comes back to haunt me… we can’t solve everyone’s problems, unfortunately! Hope you find some peace..❤️Xo Ricki

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    1. We can't and I am sure I will reach that peace. It is just a bit raw right now.

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  21. That coffee thing has happened to me too. What a piss-off. Now I think twice before leaving the kitchen, whether brewing coffee or running dishwater!

    I woke up at 4 a.m. angry because of what I was dreaming. It took me a few minutes to settle myself down and convince myself I was pissed off about something that wasn't happening right now. Hours later, though, I'm still thinking about it. The mind, she is a funny creature.

    -Kate

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