After my sleepless night, I must say, I nestled down into that bed last night, and slept like a rock. I woke up at five.
I got up and made my coffee. I sliced a thawed venison backstrap. I tossed them into a crockpot with a simmer sauce. I've never tried one before, but we'll see what happens. I added the carrots and celery and large wedges of onion (all the better for William to pick them out).
Then I carried my coffee into the office to look at the boys' school days. I printed off the material for the younger one's written assignments. I wrote William's schedule up on a white board. This is something that he will hopefully get to the point of being able to assemble himself, but for right now, the schedule is confusing and you need to draw it in from three different sources.
He's learning organization. I have five folders on his desk. His job today will be to fill the folders with the things he needs for each class. I have a rack for him to place them in. His work space will be uncluttered and he will have the space to work.
He's my challenge. I've walked this path before at a time when ADHD was not a 'thing'. I failed. Lacking the resources, I floundered around, trying one thing after another, and the inconsistencies probably made things worse. With William, I am surer. I've learned a lot in the intervening 30 years.
Schooling is a real responsibility. I take it pretty seriously. I'm starting to develop relationships with the teachers and some of the other parents during those zoom meetings. I know there are a lot of people struggling right now. As we waited for the kids to all log in during one class, a mother expressed some frustration with a link. "If it is any consolation, we had the same problem," I offered. She said, "ARGH! Can I rip out my hair now?" The teacher said, "I think we're all struggling." Someone offered up, "My child misses school so much." I said, "Shoot. I miss school so much." Everyone laughed when the teacher said, "So do I."
It's good to laugh.
"Is it too much for you?" I was asked at the end of the day. "Is this too hard?"
The question surprised me. It doesn't matter. We are living in strange times. We all can't bail because it's too hard. We all have to figure out how we're going to get it done.
I suppose in the end, we'll all be the better for it.
I sip my coffee and do the preparations for the day, and wait for the dawn to break.