It scares me, these lapses.
I decided the sensible thing was to begin carrying a purse. One is far less likely to drop something or leave it behind if it is slung over a shoulder.
Friday, I drove my brother in law into town to pick up a rental car. The deer had sensibly run across the road and into the brush before suddenly changing his mind, turning back and flinging himself into my sister's car.
"I don't know what is wrong with my car," I said. "It doesn't seem to want to shift."
The thing is I had not driven my car much. We tend to stick to the Suburu because the gas mileage is better. That is the only explanation I have. My brother in law looked down, laughed and shifted the car from Low to Drive. I was mortified.
In the Suburu, Drive is straight all the way back. To put it into Low, you move the gear shift from Drive to the left. In the Lincoln, it is a straight operation: park, reverse, neutral, Drive and low. I just pulled the shift all the way back like you would for the other car.
I forget things.
There is part of me that just wants to blame it on my preoccupation with the chaos around me. There is another part of me that worries that it is not.
It's quite likely that your memory issues relate to stress. And you've had plenty.
ReplyDeleteActually, things have been more settled lately.
DeleteMy town is doing some road repairs and has made my street a detour. One hour in a semi pulled wires from my house. My husband got them out of the street and had me call the police station on the nonemergency line. They asked my name (I knew that), my address ( I knew that) and my telephone number. I. Could. Not. Remember. My Telephone. Number. I started stopped three times, panicking, and finally said "I don't know" in the most pitiful cry.
ReplyDeleteWhat makes this worse is that my son is a police detective. He hasn't heard this story yet or I will never hear the end of it. I worry about me too. I think our brains are too full.
Lol. I have done this...
DeleteHow often does one phone one's own number?!
DeleteThat's what I always said, but had to learn it as people ask so often what it is . . . Miss Merry - when distressed, vital information seems to go down a drain in your head!
DeleteYou all are making me feel better!
DeleteWhen you drive you use your rote memory and changing vehicles where the positioning is different naturally you will be confused. A shoulder bag is much more difficult to loose than carrying a wallet loose. Somewhere in the depths of my bag is my car fob and although I never see it I wouldn't be able to start the car if I didn't have my bag so I never am without it.
ReplyDeleteOur cars are older. No fobs for us...but that would really be handy!
DeleteWait! You drive manual cars?
ReplyDeleteAh, Miss Merry. Sometimes I stumble over numbers too — like bank numbers that I have inputted many times.
No. Both cars are automatic, but they still need to be put into gear. But...I can drive a manual and to be frank, I prefer standard shift in the winter.
DeleteA friend of mine needed a new purse. She went into Kohl's and knowing she would need a purse designed better for her personal use as she needed to have a secure place to put her phone where she could reach it if it rang. She tried out various styles, pulling out the wads of paper stuffing each time checking where the phone placement would be. She finally chose a purse, paid for it and drove home. Hours later she couldn't find her phone. She figured out she had left it at the store in one of the purses. Frantically, she drove back and checked all the purses she had handled. She found it tucked into a really safe place in one of the purses. She is about 20+ years older than you, maybe more. So, my dear, you have a long time before you have to worry about such things. We all do it at one time or another and if someone says they don't, they will lie to you about something else.
ReplyDeleteLol. okay. I am not there. Yet.
DeleteThe time to worry would be when you get home, can’t find your phone, and don’t remember that you’ve BEEN at the store trying out purses!
DeleteLol. Well that does make me feel better!
DeleteI use my debit card for everything. Can rattle off the 16 digit number any time! Except somtimes when I am on the phone. A complete blank! So I have learned to always write it down before I will need it on a call. Last week a different twist. I was picking up a prescription at Walmart. Mentioned to the girl that I had not received a text notification that it was ready---- and said maybe I put STOP sometime to end unnecessary texts. That was fine, she said. Just type in your phone number there, and next time you will get a text...EASY. Typed in the number. As I hit the last digit I realized---- I had typed in our old landline number which we haven't used in about 20 years! How embarrassing! Had to redo the whole transaction with ID, etc. so I could put in the correct number! Shaky world I am living in! But I am several years older than you.
ReplyDeleteWe lived in our last house for 32 years and the number of times I go to give that address or phone number, still, and yet we moved 4 years ago. Automatic pilot . . .
DeleteYes. Automatic pilot is the term! In my case if I am feeling at all rushed, I am in real danger of doing something dumb!
DeleteWe all begin to look for signs at our age. One of my lads suggested I could be forgetful. As I pointed out, I now have to clean for myself, manage the home, do shopping, and remember everything else in my daily life. Aside from vacuuming, I didn't generally do any day to day cleaning, I didn't have to think about food, Ijust went along for the ride and brunch when food shopping, and ideas and plans were bounced off each of us, with my late partner. Now my brain has to think of and remember an awful lot of things. If I sometimes forget something, too bad.
ReplyDeleteSorry, just to support what you are doing with with your purse, I think it was three times in one year where I left my wallet somewhere. Ok, I thought. I've been lucky to get it back each time, but I need to change the way I carry it, and I did. Not a problem since.
DeleteThe bag was very sensible solution for me. It seems to have done the trick. As far as the rest of it, quite honestly my problem is that I jump into things without thinking ahead. ADD was not a 'thing when we were kids, but I think that I probably had it. It has gotten to be less of a problem now. I can consciously slow myself down.
Delete“One is far less likely to drop something or leave it behind if it is slung over a shoulder.”. This has been my mantra all my life!
ReplyDeleteIt has become mine too.
DeleteFunny that here a woman's wallet can be called..a purse!
ReplyDeleteA shoulder bag is a good idea.. until it gets too full of "essentials" and too heavy!!!
Too funny. Here, a purse is something with handles. I guess technically, something slung over the shoulder would be referred to as a bag. I am no expert though. I haven't carried anything but a 'clutch' (wallet) for years.
DeleteWell, it looks like we all do such daft things. I put it down to not paying attention enough. So many things going on in our lives and we are just not concentrating. My girls despair of me sometimes!
ReplyDeleteMy father referred to it as being a rattle-ass.
DeleteOh. Very. YES!
ReplyDeleteIt would appear that I am not alone!
DeleteDefinitely!
ReplyDeleteI am feeling as if I am in good company!
DeleteI've tried carrying a "phone wallet" one of those things with a wrist strap, and every time I do, I set the damn thing down somewhere. So, nope, I carry a backpack purse I can wear like a backpack or as a cross-body so I have free hands. And yep, I have tons of crap in it, and it can get heavy, but damn, when I need something, it's IN there. And if you're scared that forgetting might be something medical, there is a blood test you can get for dementia/Alzheimer's. I took it years ago (when my sister got dementia, after both parents got it) and mine was negative. So, I could breathe easier. Note that exercise is the number one way to stave off dementia. And keeping your blood sugar stable is the other way. You are very good at both!
ReplyDeleteI really work at keeping my brain active too.
DeleteI carry a lightweight cross body bag where my phone, key fob and wallet live. I can even drive while wearing it, so never have I lost it. I like having both hands free. I forget things too, but never lose anything. I try to keep things in the same place so I won’t misplace them, it helps. I am much older than you. I prefer a standard car too, but the traffic is so heavy now that I finally gave in and bought an automatic several years ago. I am 84 and still drive most days.
ReplyDeleteMy first car was a standard. For a time I stuck with that because standards were cheaper. Plus... you can't beat a standard for winter driving.
DeleteI’m a bloke, so I put my wallet in my back pocket (or now and then in my front pocket). I guess that’s an advantage of men’s trousers – that they have all those pockets.
ReplyDeleteMy car has first gear, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th (and reverse) – it’s a manual. I’ve always driven a manual car, but then, I’m not American so I can cope with such things.
Many Americans drive manual/standard transmission and cope well too.
DeleteMary
Littlemancat is right. It is not a lost art here but it is becoming less common. Something odd about pockets, though. Men's pockets are much deeper than women's. Our pockets are so impractical.
DeleteI carry my wallet in my back pocket, and I often feel for it to reassure myself it's still there. I wear pants with pockets all the time, so it's just getting into the habit of finding pants with back pockets big enough. BTW, thanks so much for the comment. I now feel we are connected.
ReplyDeleteI am afraid to carry things in my back pocket ever since the fateful day I lost my cellphone down a Porta potty!
DeleteDebby- I am the same with the slips. I can't really deny them now.
ReplyDeleteOur minds get distracted watching our country burning.
DeleteI keep saying that thankfully, Glen and I both seem to be losing it at about the same rate of speed.
DeleteSo many things on our minds these days, leads to distractions and mistakes. Glad you always found your wallet and are working on solutions. "Don't worry; be happy" ;)
ReplyDeleteAs the saying goes, 'so dumb he's happy'
DeleteA small crossbody purse is the best for when you're out and about, hands free and essentials safe.
ReplyDeleteSo far, it has been sn effective solution.
DeleteIt was normal for me to slowly slip into mental lapses. And the good part is that I can't do anything about it!
ReplyDeleteSo far, it appears that I can do something about my goofs.
DeleteThis happened to me 2 days ago. My husband and I are traveling and I was asked my address. I promptly gave it but for some unknown reason I gave the zip code for a previous home.
ReplyDeleteI was addressing a package to my son's family and put our zip code instead of theirs
DeleteSounds like you are not alone, Debby! I have those "Are they friendly spirits, Bullwinkle?" moments, myself, and they're always a bit of a shick. Like, what the heck!
ReplyDeleteBULLWINKLE! Now there is a blast from the past!
DeleteAnother vote for a crossbody bag for the essential items. You never have to put it down, and it won’t get in the way. Learned this when keeping up with a baby/toddler. Olivia in the PNW, infrequent commenter.
ReplyDeleteGlad you checked in Olivia!
DeleteNot to worry, you are just covered up and busy! Happens to everyone.
ReplyDeleteI really felt dumb about the car. I feel better today.
DeleteI've always had a shoulder bag since the 60s. I like my hands free. Now they call them cross-body bags. These new very small ones that are just large enough to hold your cell phone and a very few select things look so perfect for going on walks, etc.
ReplyDeleteBeing forgetful worries me some, too. If it gets to worrying me even more I might ask for one of those blood tests. I had a grandmother who forgot short term and then all long term memory. But she was in her 90s at the time and lived to be 104--lol! ;)
Years ago, I heard on an NPR show about senility, that "If you've lost your car keys, you're just living in 20th C America. If you don't know what your car keys are for, then you have a problem!" I have clung to that many a time. I really do wish I could clean and defrag my brain like I do my hard drive - I really do not need to remember my childhood phone number, I need to remember my current cell phone's number!
ReplyDelete