Today, I had a big day at work. I was trying to pick up two clients who'd been absent on my previous visit to the facility, and my Fridays are hectic to begin with. Adding two clients...well, it was the biggest daily caseload I'd ever carried, and I wasn't sure that I could do it, but...
....I begin work at 8. According to my schedule, I'm supposed to use that time to prepare for my day, and see my first client at 9. However, two clients arrive before 9, and so I started a few minutes early.
...clients eat their lunch at 11, so generally speaking, that time is used to enter the morning notes. I gave up the morning data entry and saw two clients with g-tubes who do not eat lunch.
...I skipped my own lunch break and saw another client.
...and one of my appointments was absent.
One by one, I went down through my list, doing therapy, making notes, checking people off.
By the end of the day, I had seen them all.
I used my one hour at the end of the day, and typed like crazy, getting the day's data entry done in one hour. I walked out of there feeling very accomplished. Although my day was cram-jammed, I can say that no sessions were rushed. There was eye contact, and there were hugs. A chance to meet a family member. I made important discoveries about two very challenging clients which led to very successful sessions. Things like that thrill me in a way that I cannot explain.
You know, for most of my life, I've been doing some pretty negative self talk. I have often tried to break myself of the habit. Today, I found myself striding across the parking lot, my rain coat flapping loose in the breeze. I realized that I was having another inner dialogue. For the first time, I heard me telling myself, "You are very good at what you do. You have a God-given skill to reach people. You are where you are supposed to be."
I stood at my car for a minute, amazed at the changes in myself. At 55, I have become self-confident, and I'm not sure how it happened, but I drove home being very grateful that it has.