Monday, March 26, 2012

Prospective Tenants

We've got an apartment in the paper for rent, and it astonishes me how some people think.

I just took a call. The young man was supposed to meet Tim this morning but did not. He works nights. He got home from work and dozed off and did not wake up. I understand that. I worked nights. I know how tired you can get.

He wondered if there were any way he could still see the apartment. I said, "Well, I'm showing the apartment to two parties at 6:30. If you would like to come over then, you can see it as well."

Long pause.

"Is there any way that you could show the apartment right now?"

Yes. I could. Except that it is after five, and if I head down there, I'll either have a big chunk of dead time between showings, or will have to make two separate trips to the apartment within a hour and a half. I took a deep breath. "No," I say. "This is inconvenient for me, since I already have people coming in less than an hour and a half."

And he says, "Well, then I'll just give your husband a call tomorrow during the day. I don't have to work tonight, and I'm going out."

Or this:

A young woman calls. She wants to see the apartment. She and her boyfriend are looking for a place. "It's pretty small," I say. She assures me that it is fine. She likes small places. They are comfortable in small places. She wants to know if we take pets.

"We have, I say carefully, "but we must meet the people first, and then the pet...what do you have?"

"A rottweiler," she tells me.

I remind her again that this is a small apartment, and that we would not consider an animal that big.

She tells me that the dog had been very ill as a puppy, with parvo. As a result, this dog is no bigger than your average cocker spaniel.

Yeah. Right. Does she remember that I would have to actually see this dog first? I said to her, "I'm afraid not. Your dog is too big for the apartment. We've allowed pets before, but they've been shih-tzu or something like that. It is a very small apartment."

She got mad, and she got mad quickly. "You know what? Just forget it. We're not interested in your apartment!"

Okie dokie.

And finally, it amazes me the number of people who come to the apartment looking at it for their children. Their grown up children. Sometimes they get quite irritated to hear that we expect to meet the prospective tenant in person before reaching any agreement.

All righty then.

I guess none of them top the day a mother came with her son. She loved the apartment. He loved that it was so near the skateboard park. His mother explained to me that she would be coming over twice a week to make sure he was doing his dishes and keeping the place clean. He had the look of trouble, sullen and curt, just a shade away from arrogant, and so I stressed to the son (and to his mother) that we tried to select our tenants with an eye towards people that would fit in well with the people already in the building, people that could get along. It was important to us that our tenants be respectful.

The mother turned to her son and said, "You hear that? That means when you get mad, you can't be punching holes in the wall or kicking out windows."

Not a snowball's chance in hades...

We've had a couple with a baby and a coonhound who wanted the efficiency (a living area, kitchen and bath), and felt that it was discrimination that we would not consider them.

We've had a couple who are new to the area with a pit bull and a rottweiler. In talking, they mentioned their best friend. I recognized the name. Their best friend was a druggie. I said, "He's got quite a drug problem." They cheerfully said, "Yes. That's what we heard."

I don't know.

Honest to pete, I just don't know. This rental thing is really testing my faith in humanity.


Caroline said...

What are people thinking? Keep looking you'll find someone that is right.

Jayne said...

You will find the ideal tenant but always stand firm on your rules.
And listen to your gut instinct ;)

Anonymous said...

Saounds as though you have the characters for a book right there!Barb

Oopsiemumma said...

I'm with Barb, that's definitely book material!
We went through an agent to rent our property out and all seemed fine until we decided to move back into our home and had to ask the tenants to leave. Then he got so abusive to our agent that they had to lock down their own office for three days. This tenant thing certainly does test your belief in good human beings.

quid said...

Good luck finding the right person(s), Deb!


A Novel Woman said...

I'm sorry...can't help laughing.

People are just eejits sometimes, are they not? The skateboarding wall puncher's mother is my favourite.

Anonymous said...

I know exactly how you feel Deb! I hate being aladlord but inherited the farm apt with the farm which , that , I really always wanted but not the hassles of tenants. So lucky we have found good ones with Becky and Wiltsie. But Ive had the same ones inquire that you have passed on, and yes I think my fav of yours is alos the skate boarding/wall puncher! Good luck, I referred somebody to day to you that was looking online.

BUSH BABE said...

Agree with my mother (anonymous barb) - definitely a character or two for a book right there!

Bill of Wasilla said...

I want to rent your apartment so it will be there someday when I decide to move down there with my pet orangutang, who loves to with BB guns. I might stay for just a week, in which case I expect a full refund.

Please hold it for me and I will pay you when I get there.

Bill of Wasilla said...

I left a very clever comment. It disappeared when I clicked, "Publish your comment."

Debby said...

No, Bill. Your very clever comment was there. 'Old' blog post comments are captured and held for moderation. I've been having a terrible time with spammers lately. They prey on my older posts, and I do not want to subject my readers to endless comments about naked celebrities, viagra, etc.

I am sorry Bill, we would be unable to rent to you. It is very suspicious that your pet orangutang has to arm himself with a bb makes us wonder about your character, that your pet must bear arms.

I'm afraid that we would have to ask Jim to vouch for you.