Tuesday, October 18, 2011


Got a lot done today, even though I don't feel as if I got enough done. Hard to believe that I am half way done with the semester already. I don't know what will happen with field work next semester, after the conflict with the teacher. I had straight As at midterm except for one C+ (wince). I'm not sure what is the right approach to take here. Normally, I'd just meet with her, set out my misgivings and have a discussion, but I'm a little leery. The last meeting was not a discussion. She did not listen. She spoke, and she made it clear that I had no right to be critical of a teacher. I believe that if I disagree with anything she says, it might well be construed as being critical of a teacher once again. I think that the only option here is to keep my head down, and my mouth shut, just maintain a professional distance, and study harder. The other students are supportive (privately) but they also are keeping their distance from me. That's okay too. We'll just see the way the cards play on this one.

Today, I visited with an elderly woman. She told me about the house that her grandfather built. She said, wistfully, "I'd just like to drive past that house and see what it looks like now." The house is a simple 15 minutes away. I talked to the people there, and asked if it were possible to take her out for a couple hours on a Sunday afternoon, and stop for ice cream on the way back. They thought it was an excellent plan, and thought the daughter would approve. I gave my phone number to them, so that the family could call.

I walked out into the fall day. I saw a bumper sticker. It said, "Be the change." You know, there are a lot of things which cannot be changed. Sometimes, it seems like the smallest changes are the ones that make the real difference though.

Well. I've pondered stupid stuff long enough. Time for bed. It's been a long day, and tomorrow is even longer.

Tractor Supply story: Today I was working away at the store, and a elderly fellow comes up, big white beard, and a shock of white hair. He says, very seriously (but with a twinkle in his eye), "I've been thinking to take up a new crop. Do you have any books about getting started in marijuana farming?"and he gestured at our magazine/book rack. I knew he was joshing me. I like to josh too, though. My eye caught a magazine cover, and I looked right back at him and said, very seriously (but with a twinkle in my own eye), "Yes sir, we do." He looked a bit startled. I reached down and said, "Here's a magazine called 'Mary Jane's Farm'. Seems like you'd be able to find some good information there." I had him, and he burst out laughing, a big bellow of laughter. He went his way, and I went back to stocking.


Scotty said...

Mary Jane's Farm - LMBO.


Bob said...

Love "Be the Change." A message to you, perhaps, to change the things you can but to be content w/ those you can't.

Debby said...

I think that maybe I've gotten 'there', Bob. My knee jerk response to conflict has always been to try to defend myself.

It is hard for me to be criticized, coming from a highly critical family. I tend to take the criticisms to heart. But this time was different. I looked at this incident, and I saw that a large part of it was unwarranted. It's hard to explain, but realizing that in your own heart, but it makes you feel differently. There is no reason to discuss it with others, to complain about it...it was a disagreement between two people that was handled poorly. And this time, I was not the person who handled it poorly.

I guess that's what being a professional is.

jeanie said...

It is hard when the person you had the disagreement with is a person who has control over further situations you may require assistance with. "Over a barrel" I believe is the term.

I had a situation similar in school with a teacher who expected me to be more like a certain big sister (of whom she was a fan) and less like a snotty 13 year old (of which I was one).

The first D (as in ABCDE, not distinction) was perhaps warranted (see snotty attitude above), but the next and the next not so - and it looked to be a lifetime (okay, year = lifetime to snotty 13 year olds) of Ds to a girl who didn't do Ds, thank you very much.

Sometimes you have to work out another angle. I fronted said teacher with the least amount of snotty 13 year old attitude possible (for a snotty 13 year old as afflicted with the adjective as I was) and asked how I could wipe the D pattern (in far more tactful terms than that), and ended up doing a demonstration debate against the dux to "prove myself".

Not saying public debate is always the way, but if you fear the possibilities of what terror she can wreak then she has the power already and it will be a burden to you from now right until she exercises it or you need it. You don't have to act right now - but you do have the power to investigate (in your mind if need be for the time being) possible solutions that she can exit this without feeling too much egg on her face (which she does deserve, but it won't make your life easier).

BUSH BABE said...

WEll I started off ready to comment on your 'situation' and then read my sister's comment above.

Funny how we all see things differently. I was aware of the conflict at school, but at the same time aware of how very brilliant the allegedly 'snotty' one was/is (NB I was probably the snotty one - my hayfever was/is shocking!). Time would prove me right with regard to my baby sister's brilliantness - and also lessen my respect for the teacher with whom I had enjoyed such a great relationship.

Everyone is different. And different people need handling differently to bring out their best.

You'll work it out. Step back from it a little. The way forward will come to you.


Debby said...

I think the way forward is to step back from it. Sounds strange, doesn't it?