Thursdays are my 'long days' at school. Class starts at 9. My last class finishes at 3:50. Yesterday, by the end of the day, I was dragging. In fact the instructor for our lively English Comp class had us watch a video, Blackadder, about WWI soldiers. Embarrassingly, I found myself nodding off during it, even though it was a good video.
I seem to be losing steam, and that bothers me. It's a struggle to keep up. It's not just me, I know that. Yesterday, walking out of English, trying to rouse myself for the drive home, Vanessa and I talked. She's doing well in class, but she's struggling too. She said, "Do you ever find yourself looking around the class and wondering who will not be coming back at the end of the semester?"
I hadn't. I know that some people are struggling, but I didn't realize that any of us were struggling to that degree. It made me feel a little babyish, to be disappointed with an 86 on that midterm, to be fighting my own perfectionism with every paper I turn in. There are people struggling with worse grades, and yet they keep on trying. They show up to class every day and they keep on working away at it. They will go down trying. That's real heart, there.
I am hopeful that Vanessa is wrong. We have an awfully nice class. I'd hate to lose any of them.