The gas station where I work has 14 pumps. Of those 14 pumps (which are on both sides of the building), we are required to 'keep an eye' on the customers because they have the option of pumping first and then coming inside to pay. You'll have the occasional customer who will 'forget' to pay, but most of them are pretty good. Thursday night however, we had three drive offs on our shift. One was actually not my fault, because my register had quit working and the manager was on it. However, by the time that I got back on my register and discovered the driveoff, the other register was preparing to break, and I was told the ring the sale up. Later I figured it out: this meant that I was 'claiming' it. I was the one who had to call it in to security. I felt badly about it. I haven't had a driveoff before. But to have two more on top of that? God. I went in yesterday, and I worked the whole day. As I was coming close to ending my shift, we discovered that we'd again, had two driveoffs. The assistant manager was quite upset. The store was busy. We had lines. There's no way to keep track of all those pumps and wait on customers one right after another. To compound things, I made a mistake on the register and couldn't figure out how to fix it. I had to ask her help. She was very upset and let me have it, complaining about mistakes that I'd made before ('But you told me about them, and I've corrected them.' 'But only after I told you about them.' 'Well, isn't that what training is?' Next thing you know, I was as upset as she was. Doing a good job is important to me, and I felt awful. Number 1: She shouldn't have upbraided me in front of everyone. Number 2: She shouldn't have blamed me for the driveoffs. Number 3: We were both upset.
The thing is, I don't have a clue how to prevent this: the store is just too busy. The assistant manager told me that everyone else manages to do it. I personally think that we are lucky to live in an area where most people are honest, and then driveoffs are not a big problem because of that. I cannot keep track of the pumps, the customers on them, the vehicles on them (some of the pumps cannot be seen from the store). I don't know what to do. I think that I am going to get fired, and I am sick about it, even though my little co-worker sent a comforting text message to Cara later on.
I actually have a stomach ache about this. I've also skipped church to study for two huge exams (Cara is teaching Sunday School for me). I am so stressed that I feel like I will burst. I don't even know what to do. I finally decided to simply pray about it, and put it in Someone else's hands.
(He hasn't made my stomach feel any better)
I do find myself wondering though...is this actually too much stress or am I simply less able to deal with it?
Back to the books. I'm half way done with the study guide, I've taken five pages of notes. Thanks for taking a break with me.
Tornado watches here until 3 PM. It is dark and blustery. My insides feel very like that.