Friday, October 30, 2009

Why Mothers have Gray Hair

I was on my way out the door to deliver a home cooked meal. I checked e-mails (that was my mistake). I had one from Cara, sent via blackberry. It read, 'Whatever you hear in the news about clarion, don't worry about it.. They exagerated everything.'


I responded to that e-mail, with words to the effect: 'What the...???! What's happened?'

The veritable font of information that is my child texted me: 'Not me, everythings fine. You're just gonna here some things that happened in the news, and they sound scary but they're not.'

Mama lunged for the phone. After dialing her number, I heard 'Hi. This is Cara. Leave a message and I'll call you back.' I'm standing there with a warm meal and home made bread. I have to leave.

Tim and I share a cell phone. He's got it. I met up with him after work. I grabbed the cell straight away, and I tried to call Cara. I heard her cheerful voice: 'Hi, this is Cara...' etc. etc. I fretted while I washed the storm windows and Tim hung them.

By the time we got home, we could read about it online. There was a fight in the dining hall and one student stabbed another. There was also another text sent from Cara's blackberry earlier after my calls from the cell: 'MOM I'm in class.. Quit calling me, what's wrong?'


She finally called back nearly five hours after that first text. "I told you there was nothing to worry about. I saw the television news crews and figured you would have a hissy fit, so I sent a quick text, even though I was on the way to class." She acted as if her noble act should warrant a cookie. I pointed out that we couldn't have seen it on television. She cheerfully said, "Oh. I forgot you don't get reception.

Initially, she did not seem to understand that nothing about her original messages was reassuring. (In fact it had the opposite effect.) I'm pretty sure, though, that the ensuing conversation made it pretty clear how we will handle a situation like this in the future. Or maybe it was Tim's calm assurance that the next time we received a message like that, we'd simply hop in the car and drive the hour and a half to her college to find out what was going on.

Cara, this is the sort of thing that Santa takes note of. Seriously.


WhiteStone said...

Gotta remember that last line...surely I will find it useful sometime. roflol

Laura Jane said...

I hear what you're saying....but she DID call! And was clearly fine. Its tricky, 2 call or not 2 call?

And Santa? Seriously? Is that even a threat at that age? Just greet her with a joke gray wig next time she sees you.

(But I would be driving to college too, then I'd have to FIND her at college, and get more grey hair....oh never mind)

WhiteStone said...

Hey! I HAVE one of those gray wigs! I could loan it to ya!

Debby said...

Laura: Right now, the college has a PFA for her because of a situation with one of her students. School shootings are not unknown. Cara should have texted and left a clear message. Hinting that the news from college would be scary, and that television news crews were there was hardly reassuring. For future reference, the proper call is a cheerful, "Hi Mom, everything is okay, talk to you tonight." The message does not raise red flags. If I were to get wind of something major happening at the college, I'd be able to see from the time of Cara's cheerful call that she was okay.

The Santa line was a joke. It was a very long day.

Bob said...

We earn each and every gray hair, don't we? Or, in my case, each and every quarter-inch of recession in the hair line.

Karen said...

Kids are funny, aren't they? It's amazing which issues WE take seriously, and they don't, and vice versa! I could feel your worry, Debby!

RedWifey said...

Oy! and HA! Glad she was ok!

Tim's option about driving up to check on her is a great one to smooth the communication lines! Good thinkin'!

Here's a hug while I go count my gray hairs. :)

Beth said...

Glad she is okay. Your sense of humor is great! (loved the iBoob the other day)

Lydia said...

Oh my gosh... I would have had the same reaction. AND I think you still have the right to pull the Santa card, even if she is grown up. I think I'm going to use that with my son the next time he pulls a bonehead move. LOL

Debby said...

Lydia: don't you think life was a lot easier when you could pull the Santa card...and it worked? Every time?

Kelly said...

They do have a knack at dropping those bombshells, don't they!

I was gray long before my time.

Glad it wasn't anything serious for her.

PaintedPromise said...

wow. glad to hear she was ok... my girls will sometimes call and i can hear SOMETHING in their voices... between me saying "what's wrong" and getting the answer, yeah, there's at least one more gray hair...

steviewren said...

Sounds like Santa might be collecting coal and switches for you Cara....better be a good girl and give the kind of reassurances Mom's need next time....full disclosure...all the details...and maybe a picture of you to show that not even a hair on your sweet little head has been touched or hurt in any way.