As you all have probably figured out, I'm coming out of a hard time. I know that I've got a great deal to be grateful for, but here's the truth of it: One year ago, I had cancer, and it frustrates me that I am not 'over it'. I don't feel well and wonder what that means. The aches and pains are discouraging. The last couple months have really taken their toll.
Trying to find information on what to expect after cancer is difficult. There is not a lot of information. Bloggers have come through once again, sharing their own experience. I realized, finally, that I've been looking at it all wrong. I have been looking at this one year milestone, and really fretting about the fact that I am not over cancer. September 26th, I found the lump. October 6th, it was official. One year ago, I found out I had cancer, and dammit, I'm not over it yet.
Cancer did not make me sick. It was the treatment for cancer than knocked me on my keister. For the first time, I really understood what chemo and radiation actually does to a body. I'm being unrealistic to expect that I'll simply 'get over it'. * snaps fingers* Especially, considering I'm only 5 months out of treatment. I feel a little stupid, really, because people have been telling me right along. My response has been a snarly 'yeah, but it's been a whole year'. Finally it has sunk in.
Really, people, I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. Not the brightest crayon in the box. Etc.