I've often wondered how some people can endure the unendurable and come away with a profound understanding of God. Others enduring the same experience can come away convinced that there is no God at all. This is a discussion of God and war. Sometimes, the words were painful to hear. I folded laundry thoughtfully, listening, and on a rainy and dark afternoon in Pennsylvania, I contemplated my own beliefs, my own humanity. Only once in my life have I ever threatened to kill someone, and I meant it, with all of my heart. I also knew that I was capable of it. It changes you to say those words. It changes you to mean them. But the stories that I listened to while matching socks are much bigger than any small drama I have known. I listened to principled and moral people discuss why they believed or did not. I listened to their reasoning, and I understood why they turned to God, and even why they turned away from Him.
I know what it is that I believe, but today I thought a great deal about why I believe in these things. It occurs to me that when you listen, you think. The world would be a much better place if we all learned to listen more.