Thursday, May 21, 2009

Reading Glasses

I'm hell on reading glasses. I don't mean to be, but I am. It would be a lot easier if I could manage bifocals, but I'm uncoordinated, right down to my eyeballs. I could never get the hang of looking up and looking over, and I fell up stairs. I fell downstairs. They actually made me sick to my stomach, so I gave up on bifocals. I keep a half dozen pairs of reading glasses stashed because I'm so hard on them. Yesterday, I broke yet another pair. I'm not sure what I did this time. Breaking them is a novelty. I've only done that three or four times. Usually, I lose them. I slide them up on my head when I'm not using them, and pull them down on my face when I am. This habit has resulted in reading glasses being whipped from my head by branches while pushing my way through brush. I have tried putting them in a pocket, but they fall out of pockets. I've tried the chain around my neck thing, and have darn near throttled myself many a time. They have also pulled loose and gotten lost that way as well. I got a bright red pair of readers once. They looked ridiculous, but I figured they'd be easy to find when I lost them. I was in Weldbank, when a branch whipped back and sent them flying from my head. I looked high and low, but never found them. I lost a sturdy pair of metal readers in Saybrook. I actually stopped what I was doing to form up a search party. They were not found either. I am down to two pair of readers again, and I'm taking one pair of them to work with me. (That's the kiss of death for those.) That means this weekend, I'll go out and stock up on more reading glasses. Honestly. I have this notion that some day I'll be out and about, and a befuddled looking old bear will stroll by with a pair of bright red reading glasses pushed up on his grizzled old head. I recognize the look right away, and I will lean over and and whisper, "They're on your head..."

9 comments:

Roxanne said...

I had a little angel pin that actually held my glasses. I could just reach up and slide them in and out. It was a real help. Now I have contacts that one eye sees close up and one far away. If you only have trouble seeing close up maybe you could only wear one. They are really soft and you never have to wonder where they are. Why do our eyes have to get old, anyway??

Mary Paddock said...

I once knew an old vet who kept a pair of glasses in the pocket of every white coat he wore, in his desk, and in every exam room. And from time to time he was still found wandering the halls looking for a pair. I thought it was charming, but then he was seventy-five years old. Unlike me. I'm forty-four and search and rescue missions for my glasses are almost a daily occurrence in our household.

PS. I hated the chain too. Though in my case, it's a vanity thing. It made me look old(er).

Kelly said...

I only use reading glasses when wearing my contacts (tried the mono vision thing with the contacts, Roxanne, but couldn't get the hang of it...gave me headaches). Fortunately I'm pretty good with my bifocals. And... since I got a pair of TryChange glasses (bifocals) where I can switch out the frames to match my clothing I've gotten where I hardly ever put my contacts in..... thus not having to fool with reading glasses. Which, btw, I kept several pairs all over the house and a couple in my purse or pockets. I would get the $1 kind from the dollar store so I wouldn't feel bad losing them.

Cora from Hidden Riches said...

I hear you!!!!! I could have written your post! The last pair of glasses I had I stepped on and broke into a million pieces! I have the chain thingy now. Yes, it's a pain, but I'm getting used to it. Otherwise, I, too, would need a million pairs! The bifocals didn't work for me either. Tripped off the curb, tripped up the stairs, tripped down the stairs, and walked like a high stepping horse!!!!! Oh well!!!! I'm glad I'm not alone in this!
Cora

Bush Babe said...

Oh ya make me laugh girl!!! I should wear reading glasses, but I can never find the blessed things. So I don't. I squint a lot. It's a great look!!
:-)
BB

Karen said...

I have the same problem and keep pairs of glasses everywhere. Upstairs, downstairs, sewing room, living room, kitchen, van, purse......... They sell them bulk at Costco. One of these days I'm going to break down and get real glasses.

Love the story about the bear, it could happen.

Debby said...

Yep, I buy the cheapos as well. One of the local dollar stores was going out of business. 50% off everything. I made a bee line for the reading glasses. Really, I'm pathetic. They invented Lasix (sp?) for freaks like me...

Sarah said...

LOL - I have soooo many pairs!! My preschoolers think it is a total hoot when I loose them and they are right on my head. Totally cracks them up. My hubby just smirks - his time is coming!!
Nice to find your blog - how fun are you girl!!
Have a great weekend, Sarah

Sarah said...

BTW Debby - lol the bear - is now stuck in my head - I'm gonna have to draw this one!!