This weekend has been a 'sinking in' time. All the the things of the past three weeks are sinking in. It is sinking in to my husband that he needs to be different, and to his credit, I think it is sinking in. He understands that what remains is for him to begin putting this new thinking into action.
Me? Things have been sinking in for me, as well. I spent Friday in sort of a relieved fog, indulging my secret passion for Mr. Bean, and getting the ironing done. For the nth time, I wondered why I love jeans and a crisp ironed shirt, because I sure do hate to iron. But, Mr. Bean made it better. It felt good to laugh, and to laugh hard. As three weeks of tightly coiled tension begins to unwind and slither off, this is what has sunk in.
I had cancer.
I don't anymore.
The most dangerous part of the battle was done and over before I even knew I was fighting. All I have to do is make sure that he doesn't come back. Chemo. Radiation. Estrogen suppression therapy.
All I have to do is endure.
I can do that.