Sunday, April 6, 2008

Begin Again

Today was a glorious day. We went hiking. Signs of new beginnings were everywhere. I collected pussy willows. Heard peeper frogs for the first time. Went back to the sound and saw the frogs, still and floating on the water. I saw scads of frog eggs, each with their own little moving eye. The first wildflowers were blooming. We even saw a butterfly. The first of the season.
I just wanted to breathe deeply of new life.
breathe so deeply that it was a part of me.
Nature begins again.
My daughter is not in the shelter anymore.
She's been saved.
Her knight is named Mike.
And so it begins again.


Scotty said...

Sounds like a good day, Debby. Maybe your God heard you after all?


debby said...

Not on the topic of ny daughter, He hasn't. The knight is part of the cycle. Everything is perfect now. This is the car clicking to the top of the drop on that roller coaster referred to earlier. I'd hoped that in the shelter, she'd receive help, both psychiatric and occupational...truly get a new life. Perhaps Mike will work out. Most likely he's just one more knight.

Alison said...

I'm sorry you're going through such a rough time, Debby.
Remember it is not your fault, and to some extend it is not your daughter's either. She has an illness. While that doesn't mean she is absolved of her actions, it offers some insight as to why this cycle is so hard for her to break.
Hang in there Debby.

debby said...

I understand. It still breaks my heart.

Pencil Writer said...

Rollercoasters are not always fun. Actaully can tend to be heart rending, often. But, I promise you, God hears every prayer. He, however, answers in His own way, and in His own time. His desire is for our eternal growth. Never forget. Our children were and are His children first. And He's seen far more rollercoaster rides of far more children than we can even count. And yet, He loves us all.

I think it was C. S. Lewis that said something along these lines about prayer: "Our prayers don't change God. Our prayers change us." That made me do some deep pondering for awhile, but makes perfect sense in this imperfect world.

Continue to pray and exercise faith. God will point the way. Just listen for the quiet whisperings of His Spirit. He is always near and ever faithful. Oh, and He'll never cancel our right to exercise agency or free-will. It's an absolute essential in His glorious plan of salvation.