Saturday, February 9, 2008

Horror Story Scary Story

Oh, my gosh! I heard a story today that scared the bejeebers right out of me. If you would like to read this horror storyscary story yourself, go to, and look for the post that is entitled "My New Pet...or Not". It has pictures. The critter is called a sand goanna and it is basically a dinosaur. Smaller. But a dinosaur. Turns out they are not extinct after all. I looked at this grotesque creature and thought to myself, "No, Bush Babe, don't get yourself a new pet." But then she went on to say they were dandy for keeping snakes out of the yard.
Well. I am not a big fan of snakes. I know they have their role in the ecosystem, but I'm a big baby. I don't like 'em. I got to looking at pictures of the sand goanna and decided that dinosaurs were really not so repulsive as I'd originally thought. Maybe they were not such a bad pet idea after all.
I read the comments. Bush Babe's sister doesn't like the sand goanna's long toenails. They give her the shivers. Snakes give me the shivers. So I asked Bush Babe if they were aggressive creatures that darted out at you, which might lead to brief (but distressing) periods of incontinence.
Here's the horrifying part. Turns out they are not aggressive, but they are stupid, and prone to conceivably could mistake people for trees. THEY.(COULD) MISTAKE. PEOPLE. FOR. TREES. Dear God. I tried to picture what I would do if a honking big lizard with long shivery toenails suddenly ran straight at me and began climbing me.
I have to say, just imagining it, I wet myself a little. (Which appears to be a bit of an overreaction.)


Mary O. Paddock said...

I looked them up. We don't have any reptiles like that here and it's just as well. I imagine they'd be hard on the song bird population. Still, they're pretty cool and the one in Bush Babe's pictures looked like an animal who had no no real fear of anything. I think I'd be able to remind him that I'm not a tree long before there was any confusion in the matter.

Of course, I like snakes too.

Debby said...

"I think that I'd be able to remind him that I'm not a tree"

This could be a problem. I find it hard to speak coherently when my mouth is full of shrieks. Mind also shuts down rendering me incapable of debating anything of any importance.

I know that I'm a big baby, but this has been an aversion since I was a child. All these years have not changed my thinking.

BB said...

OK - I need to clarify that I have never actually HAD a sand goanna climb me ... but apparently they do, given the right (wrong) set of circumstances. SSB correctly points out it is simply their "fight or flight" response which causes this - that and the fact that the person is so scared they don't move (therefore looking very much like a tree, I suppose).
I will keeo you posted on the progress of our goanna - and whether he successfully keeps the snakes at bay (another blog on them soon!).

Debby said...

So if I happen to get a home where the goanna roam (chances of that: very similar to a snowball's chance in Hades), the secret is to be as untreelike as possible? So running through the bush screaming my head off would be a perfectly sensible precaution?

Alright, I'm exaggerating my fears slightly, and your clarification does help. Some. Thanks BB!

Mary O. Paddock said...

I'm going to use an abbreviation I rarely bother with.


You're not a baby Debby. I hate tarantulas--the only animal on the planet that I absolutely cannot abide and that brave nature-loving me can't, won't handle or have in the house. Spiders shouldn't have hair.